I Don't Care About Your Kids.

This is something that has been gnawing at me for quite some time now. It seems like everywhere I look now, friends of mine are having kids and feel the need to share every minute detail about them. It's about time that I let all of you know that I don't give a flying fuck about your children.
The problem is especially prevalent on FaceBook. People are posting their pregnancy tests, ultrasounds and then their ugly ass kids. That's another thing, everybody thinks their children are these adorable little creatures when the simple fact is that there are a lot of hideous kids out there, and chances are you are the parents of one. But honestly people, I don't need an update every time your little rug rat takes a shit or says something mildly amusing. Keep that nonsense to yourself. Of course, it is pretty easy to ignore such updates on FB by simply editing who you see on your news feed; it is not as easy in real life. I cannot tell you how many times I'll be outside smoking with someone at work and they just start yasmmering away about what their precious child did or said. The problem here is that I spend 8-12 hours a day in a warehouse with these people, so I can't really just tell them to fuck off. Instead, I kindly smile and nod and think to myself "I DON'T FUCKING CARE!" I'm sure right about now is when some people may say, "That will be you someday.", and they're probably right, but that time is years away. For now, I'm going to enjoy not having to worry about anyone but myself, while you beckon on the calls and needs of that little shit and snot machine you call a "miracle." Just do me a favor, unless I ask, keep me out of it.